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The following is a transcript of Episode 9: Ghosts! by The Last Podcast On The Left.

This transcript was based on text automatically generated via YouTube's closed captioning system. If you notice any errors, please feel free to correct them.

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00:00

I got my Colt and add my heart hand I

00:05

will put one in your box in the other in

00:07

your vagina Kathy Lutz I just love it

00:10

here alright welcome to the last podcast

00:17

on the left for Marcus parks and Henry

00:20

Zebrowski embed gizzle and today we're

00:21

talking all things I'm angry Zebrowski

00:23

suppose he is Henry Zebrowski Marcus

00:28

Parks is grabbing the Ouija board right

00:29

now yeah are gonna get you key where

00:31

they're gonna get spooky today's theme

00:33

is all ghosts all the time and I must

00:35

say we're looking at a stand right now

00:36

the vast majority of Americans do not

00:39

believe in ghosts do not believe in do

00:41

not believe they are wrong once again

00:44

lutely about everything it's like the

00:46

same percentage of people who don't

00:47

believe in ghosts the same percentage of

00:49

people who like hot pockets I love hot

00:51

pockets you don't believe in ghosts

00:53

everybody knows it yeah apparently only

00:56

33% of Americans believe in ghosts and

00:58

so this episode is dedicated to the 57%

01:02

who do not we are going to convince you

01:03

ghosts are real and they live in your

01:05

home they are real they are fucking your

01:07

wife they are having sex with your lady

01:09

that's why she's been so happy

01:11

absolutely because finally have some a

01:13

ghost who hasn't had sex for thousands

01:15

of years itself taking such a slow time

01:18

sucking on the inside of your wives

01:20

thighs going up in a ghost as a thousand

01:23

years to figure out where that clitoris

01:25

is outside of a jack

01:27

he takes his cold his cold ghost fingers

01:30

can make him hot sometimes I think I you

01:33

know they say that with a cold hot cold

01:34

I supposed to do the vagina cold hot

01:36

cold that goes through that naturally

01:38

I'll tell you one thing a ghost playing

01:40

with the clinton looks like that i

01:41

poofer you when you go to the old i

01:43

debit your name oh that makes it

01:48

clitoris stimulated a very very happy

01:50

i'll tell you that clitoris believes in

01:51

the magic of a ghost but let's really

01:53

get down to the fact that ghosts are

01:55

real let's get back to that you're

01:56

having sex with your wife and it's fine

01:57

it's totally fun why it's not cheating

02:00

it's a ghost penis it's a ghost because

02:02

it's a real penis theoretically you can

02:04

keep your hymen intact it goes right

02:06

through it as it goes yeah you never

02:07

know

02:08

but in real haunting stories of course

02:11

one of the most famous ghost stories of

02:12

all time the Amityville

02:13

whore now this is so The Amityville

02:15

Horror house was a place in would to

02:18

Amityville New York which is like out on

02:20

Long Island would you beautiful home but

02:21

it's actually very nice home and now an

02:23

iconic house everyone knows what it

02:24

looks like it's been like was five

02:26

movies our basement I know there was the

02:28

Amityville Horror one good one and then

02:30

Amityville 3d which is pretty good

02:32

pretty goes like Amityville Horror which

02:34

was just that the main one which is

02:36

fantastic um but so this is this is the

02:39

story of a house that a couple move into

02:41

and uh basically these we see a variety

02:44

of but like a house possession type

02:47

thing words like flies uh surrounding

02:50

the windows like blood dripping from the

02:51

walls to protective 'ti like brings in

02:54

the mirrors yes up like like pretty

02:56

heavily haunted stuff choo choo is that

03:02

from Ozzy that's Ozzy yeah absolutely so

03:06

they're hearing voices things are going

03:08

completely wrong I mean if they ever it

03:09

may be interesting a flytrap of a fly

03:11

script you know going on strips one of

03:13

those just get just get the new the you

03:15

know the weather guards you put under

03:16

your door after keep the flies outside

03:18

the outside there and when when the

03:21

thing starts bleeding got a fucking

03:23

tampon

03:24

get a tail get up you know I think the

03:27

priests serve is a pretty good fly strip

03:29

and yeah go horn yeah they seem to just

03:32

love him they really just go inside of

03:35

him but so so the real story of this

03:38

house it is based on a true story about

03:40

how videos people didn't feel so that

03:43

was the family lived in the house like

03:45

they owned the house run with a couple

03:47

and the de filled family was just your

03:50

standard sort of Long Island Italian you

03:52

know sort of like they were living the

03:54

American dream like sort of family and

03:56

the oldest son of the family was a

03:59

Richard

03:59 - Ronald Ronald DeFeo we don't say 04:02

Ronald it's always Ronny Ronny it's

04:08

always a Ronny never named your kid

04:10

Ronny

04:10

nine times out of ten he's going to be

04:12

in prison by the time he's 20 yeah but

04:14

for killing you I mean hey you know it's

04:17

a death wish as these parents say but so

04:19

the basically Romeo shows up at 8:00

04:23

what do you have something say I'm gonna

04:24

go into the two murders

04:26

go to this fucking murder November 13

04:28 1974 around 6:30 he shows up at a bar 04:32

around like in this Long Island area and

04:34

basically gets a bunch of dudes he's

04:36

like you gotta help me somebody shot my

04:37

mom and dad they go to the house I don't

04:39

know it was yeah who could have done it

04:42

I think I know Kalin did it um get a

04:46

kill Kim was a sperm well you never know

04:48

how old he is you dr. bloure needs time

04:50

traveler he went back and then he went

04:52

back and killed Hitler which is why we

04:53

don't know who he is

04:56

uh-huh

04:57

Hitler what was I taught all did I just

05:01

say something that happened um so we got

05:05 1974 he burst into a bar hey somebody 05:08

shot my mother somebody shot my father

05:09

and they still were in her yeah buddy no

05:12

no they didn't know about that he didn't

05:13

say that they show up at the house they

05:14

find the mother and the father dead they

05:16

then look throughout the house and they

05:17

find the other three kids all all of his

05:20

brothers and sisters shot

05:21

execution-style in this house and then

05:24

you know they've tried em and all this

05:26

stuff very there was sort of like

05:27

mysterious circumstances in the mo

05:29

here's the situation when it comes down

05:30

to the murders the the family members

05:32

were all found undisturbed - the shot

05:36

gun to their head the blood no one

05:38

remembering a shotgun noise and the

05:41

neighbors are pretty close there yeah

05:43

yeah you definitely hear there's no

05:44

silencer on the gun there is a and all

05:47

the children and the parents were found

05:48

fight it facedown on their tummies yeah

05:50

you would think that if you hear your

05:53

father get shot and your mother gets

05:55

shot shotgun blasts upstairs is going to

05:57

wake up everybody and he would spring

05:58

into action so stuff was that better

06:00

than AM radio to wake you up

06:02

oh yeah shotgun to wake you up you're up

06:04

Amelia a gunshot we'll really just get

06:06

me moving you know it's God's alarm I I

06:09

have like just a standard beep beep beep

06:12

beep along to match but what I

06:14

oh I'm the devil you know well that

06:17

would be busy oh I hate mondays Oh

06:21

Garfield Oh Garfield loves lasagna he

06:26

loves his family Garfield

06:27

kelan Johnny's gallon Odie Oh lemon

06:31

happening the whole house the thing is

06:33

it uh so mysterious circumstances

06:37

happening the murder themselves they

06:38

arrest him if they clean out the house

06:41

they then sell this house to a couple

06:44

that does not know that this happened

06:46

this is before they had sort of like

06:47

regulations in like we now you have like

06:49

property shark calm or you can look up

06:51

something kind of see what's happened in

06:52

an address before you show up that's

06:54

actually a good idea if you're buying a

06:56

house or if you're renting apartment I

06:58

would say to look on property shark calm

07:00

run your address and make sure there

07:02

wasn't a mass murder that happened in

07:04

your hair uppity property shorter cause

07:07

there is some money property shark ROM

07:10

but the so the house right yeah they

07:14

bought this house I know it was just

07:16

profoundly haunted well according

07:18

there's some there's some uh some

07:21

evidence out there that maybe they just

07:23

plan this entire thing as well it's cuz

07:25

they were there for a month and just

07:26

immediately got a book deal really you

07:29

know but that's the thing it's like

07:30

those are creative people yes they are

07:32

they're technically making use of the

07:34

American dream mm-hmm and making money

07:36

for themselves in a sort of

07:37

entrepreneurship type way of just lying

07:39

it's a straight up line so so yes so

07:43

theoretically the house is haunted by

07:45

the six people that were killed which is

07:47

Ronald DeFeo he named him sell his son

07:49

after himself that's really nice that's

07:51

always rude I'm a junior you're a junior

07:53

yeah I'm Henry Thomas a russki junior my

07:54

father was a memory Thomas Dobrowski I

07:56

went to spread on the name but that's

07:57

just me and then of course there's Lois

07:59

Duffy Oh Louise Louise Louise Louise

08:03

that's his wife in threes

08:05 43 and 42 his parents were he was 23 08:08

they were a little scampi weren't this

08:10

is back in the day the old country I

08:12

suppose so he was a car deal they were

08:14

having sex in order to keep warm on the

08:16

boat from Italy right that's a good

08:19

point

08:20

you would think their hair alone would

08:21

do it but no takes the friction of hair

08:24

on hair hey we need to get a fire up

08:26

here on the

08:27

Oh why'd you have you Italian somebody

08:28

challenge for a little while yeah just a

08:30

bum but fucker he'll just have to shake

08:32

hands do you wanna friction whenever

08:34

they touch oh my god I've never seen a

08:36

wrist so course with hair it's immediate

08:38

look at that he's got ravioli four toes

08:40

the Italian is a disappear starter we

08:43

have smallpox in and we should sell it

08:45

to the Indians so let's talk about

08:46

looking for children though dawn 18

08:48

Alison 13 mark 12 and John Matthew is

08:51

nine so this is who's haunting the house

08:53

theoretically theoretically well so if

08:56

you want to look at just like haunting

08:57

the general let's say that the art line

08:59

which is what we always say go so real

09:00

right we know they go so real so you

09:02

imagine that okay so what they what is

09:05

the general understanding of what ghosts

09:06

are which is like human beings are

09:09

fueled by an energy that keeps us alive

09:12

right which is like tricity essentially

09:15

yes energy can neither be created nor

09:17

destroyed so you look at it purposeful

09:19

structures that are built and neat and

09:22

they talk about that what what ghosts

09:23

would kind of be technically maybe are

09:26

not thinking entities but are recordings

09:29

of what happened in the house where your

09:32

energies release in this house over a

09:33

long period of time specially when your

09:34

family and your you know kids and then

09:37

when you die an incredibly traumatic

09:40

fashion it like creates this sort of

09:42

major release of energy that basically

09:44

you then are recorded into a home where

09:48

it's like now the the the house becomes

09:49

like is sort of like - we are yeah it's

09:53

like it's like a place where it's like

09:54

you're watching the same show right over

09:56

and over again which is the show of

09:57

Ronald DeFeo killing his family sure so

10:00

don't just see him go door to door and

10:03

room to room killing all the children

10:05

it's what you're going to see and of

10:07

course the walls bleed but that's where

10:09

it gets kind of intense where it's just

10:11

like you don't know is that do you think

10:13

that really happened I mean I think that

10:15

they may have seen something like that

10:16

you know we saw some shit no such thing

10:18

about thing there's never like any blood

10:21

left over on the wall it's very

10:22

mysterious but I assume if you see the

10:24

blood coming off the wall you're gonna

10:26

remember that you got to remember it you

10:28

know like you're not going to be I also

10:30

what keeps you spirits in a lot of power

10:32

lines if your home is surrounded by

10:35

power lines according to a program I saw

10:37

on the History Channel that's

10:40

really internet yeah that'll keep the

10:41

spirits in but that's why doesn't let

10:43

the energy out when they talk about when

10:44

Ghost Hunters quotient cocoa centres

10:46

which is if I could just if I'm not

10:49

going to be a comedian with my life I'm

10:51

gonna be a goddamn goes under barely

10:53

there is cuz it's either the it's either

10:55

the most insane awesome job in the face

10:56

of the planet

10:57

or it's the the greatest con job to ever

11:01

exist and that just gotta be fuckin

11:02

hilarious with them there's ghosts

11:04

everywhere oh I'm there just having the

11:06

time of their life throws guys are

11:07

always thirteen-year-old boys yeah it's

11:10

all just yeah they're huge dog and

11:12

they're always looking for you know

11:13

they're investigating ghosts but it just

11:15

always turned out to be old me mr.

11:16

MacLean Q&A; shenanigans and a ghost

11:19

costume

11:20

um that's right so these people what's

11:22

the name of the couple that moved into

11:24

the Amityville

11:24

I am not I'm actually not sure all right

11:27

so continue on sorry white very white

11:29

bread couple yeah oh yeah it was like a

11:31

yuppie family the whole thing works like

11:33

it was to like it was their first house

11:35

was like this thing uh they were super

11:38

young oh they were so excited um yeah

11:40

well here's the deal so uh yeah so do

11:43

you see it uh J Anson he wrote the novel

11:46

called The Amityville Horror he gave the

11:48

couple by the way three hundred thousand

11:49

dollars

11:50

they'd stay there for 28 days their

11:52

names are George and Kathy Lutz they had

11:55

three children they moved into 112 Ocean

11:57

Avenue and the left of the Lutz family

12:01

left the house claiming that they were

12:03

just completely haunted paranormal

12:05

activity was going on all around the

12:07

Randall house they left their clothes

12:08

they left Dara you know the the food in

12:10

the fridge she just really scampered on

12:12

out where that that kind of thing must

12:15

have seen something and it's like I

12:16

don't know

12:17

like I feel like screenwriters and

12:18

people who write novels or they're gonna

12:20

want to find a sort of contextualized I

12:21

think that and an actual ghost haunting

12:23

is going to be much more abstract like

12:25

you know when you're tripping and you

12:27

see things when you're tripping that

12:29

that are abstract but you attach a

12:32

specific thing to it yeah you know it's

12:35

just like you watch something move and

12:37

you're like oh I saw cats dancing but

12:39

like what you saw was a sort of a weird

12:41

just sort of collection of images I

12:42

imagine that if a ghost is real and if

12:45

it's that palpable of a haunting that

12:48

like it just sort of like makes you trip

12:51

balls so they're like it's like what

12:52

you're watching is

12:53

the environment change and it's like you

12:56

see a thing that looks like the stud

12:59

walls moving were to compare to blood

13:02

pouring from the wall you know you mean

13:04

we're ahead

13:05

it's on your head in Italy and that's

13:07

how it would work I imagine or I just

13:10

don't know I just don't think that a

13:11

ghost would show up with like a

13:12

personality and be like I guess I said I

13:15

feel like the same way about sort of you

13:17

know what like God right where it's like

13:19

I don't think a ghost would be like good

13:21

oh well yeah I feel like the ghost is

13:24

probably very lonely they want you there

13:26

stay here stay with me do you have to go

13:28

to work today

13:29

oh come on why don't you stay with me me

13:33

I got my cult and at my heart hand I

13:37

will put one in your Botany are they in

13:40

your vagina Kathy Lutz I just love it

13:43

here I like it here this is my favorite

13:45

house well if we're gonna talk about

13:48

ghosts we have to talk about the ghosts

13:50

puberty connection oh yeah they did like

13:53

but like poltergeist activity they say

13:54

it's like mostly surrounded by like a

13:56

sort of debt it's very prevalent among

14:00

girls as their bodies change when girls

14:03

get it maybe the blood on the wall is

14:05

just a girl putting her butt on the wall

14:08

plug it up plug it up and looks like I

14:12

in elephant butt bit but there's just

14:15

something to it with its which is why

14:17

like when Ghost Hunters come into a

14:19

house is like you know they bring the

14:20

physical instruments they bring which is

14:21

like sort of like electrical activity

14:23

right like a little what what is it

14:25

gonna taste EMF yeah whatever it is they

14:28

don't even magnetic fields and they

14:30

check that it was sort of like that's

14:32

where it would be as I'm in like sort of

14:34

magnetic level and then when your body

14:36

is changing like you literally have

14:39

sections of a woman's body is like

14:42

coming to life it's like parts of a

14:44

factory are like turning on inside but I

14:46

don't fucking know this is disgusting

14:48

I'm just say I know it's what parts of a

14:50

woman's body are coming to life what

14:51

were they doing before that they were

14:53

just going yeah

14:55

I'm gonna get out of here I'm gonna make

14:57

you bleed girl all right so then

15:01

poltergeist activity happens around them

15:03

actually the dogs hanging out where

15:05

they're constantly sniffing around the

15:06

crotch Rascoe get away Wendy come on

15:09

Rosco just something about her

15:11

alright so what they have they got a

15:14

full-spectrum camcorder this is what you

15:16

can use a a psb7 you know with this

15:19

Ghost boxes what's this ghost box is

15:22

this it's I mean it's retarded but good

15:24

the thing it goes boxes what they have

15:26

is it's this thing that sits on a desk

15:28

and it measures electromagnetic waves

15:31

and temperature changes and then what it

15:34

does is attaches words to it that it

15:37

speaks as if like creating its own sort

15:40

of like lexicon that this

15:41

electromagnetic wave and this

15:43

temperature means it's trying to say

15:45

like dog in the house yeah yeah and it

15:48

really just comes out and random ah yeah

15:50

yeah like it's all definitely dog in the

15:52

house pugs dog in the house and what

15:54

does it mean turns out woman used to

15:58

live here in the 1820s would you believe

15:59

it she'd a dog in the house holy fucking

16:02

shit Johnson I believe we've got

16:04

ourselves a haunting

16:05

all right let's burn this house to the

16:07

ground don't worry we're really Scotia's

16:09

to burn this whole fucking house to the

16:11

ground

16:11

let's kill everybody who's been here but

16:13

it won't see the ghost seems to have

16:14

their memory wiped

16:16

we don't have that sort of equipment

16:18

we'll just get a god damn janitor yes

16:23

this will not remember these ghosts I I

16:26

remembered everything it was just

16:28

terrible I just don't think I'm gonna

16:30

have taps come back to my house anytime

16:32

soon I'm a ghost hunter Oh

16:35

I mean I feel like they were the real

16:37

demons 65 bucks for that fantastic

16:40

little device for The Ghost Box so go

16:42

and pick that up right away right away

16:43

put it in your house fucking fart on it

16:45

and watch the temperature gauges go like

16:46

you know seems pretty haunted parent

16:49

cheeks

16:50

get out get out of the house did you

16:53

hear it I am so women are coming of age

16:57

and ghosts are coming around them and

16:59

this is a very very popular theory well

17:01

just that they're the changes in their

17:03

body is creating like it's creating

17:05

certain havoc in the world around them

17:08

which is like TVs

17:09

turn often like shit acomplia the

17:11

cabinets it's unnecessarily ghost paper

17:13

but it's more like just showing how go

17:16

sir if ghosts are real

17:18

right they're just another sort of

17:19

physical phenomenon like anything else

17:21

and so like you know that's of all that

17:24

stuff is real so if you are a ghost you

17:26

have a choice to go to the other side

17:28

right why would you choose to stay here

17:30

and why would or I mean why wouldn't

17:33

there be tons of ghosts because there is

17:35

no other side you know there has to be

17:37

another side I don't think so

17:39

the other side the side inside the TV

17:41

when you get to live inside you want to

17:43

go in the TV that's dinner I want to be

17:44

like TV I want to be a TV like that kid

17:47

in the Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Rhino

17:48

I know you do I don't know that's the

17:50

that's the way that I don't know if

17:53

that's how it goes alright well if I was

17:55

a ghost I'd put myself in the TV alright

17:57

that's fine that's good I'm going ghost

17:59

hunter it just gets mad something just

18:01

smells terrible something smells like

18:04

saltines and sardine been canceled yes

18:07

the been jerking off cause it can never

18:15

come I jerk off and I drag off but I

18:19

never come now that's hell on earth

18:22

yeah so the ending at the ki I meter

18:26

with the audible buzzer I play this this

18:28

ghost hunting business is the real deal

18:31

they are going out of racket whatsoever

18:34

no sir there's no way the inventors of

18:37

these machineries would be bilking

18:39

people I just want something about I

18:41

want to get a picture of somebody just

18:42

hitting the Ghost Box be like I got it

18:44

it ghost hunter calm why doesn't this

18:46

thing work

18:47

yeah I think a highly underrated ghost

18:50

movie the frighteners breakfast is great

18:53

intense yeah it's a great movie it's

18:55

super funny and it's really really scary

18:56

yeah Peter jack is great yeah day a

18:58

fucking King Kong fuck King Kong

19:01

but King Kong but we're not here to talk

19:02

about King God yeah the frighteners is a

19:06

fantastic depiction and what a nice

19:08

relationship the old shaky guy himself

19:10

had with those ghosts oh yeah I love

19:12

that that would be fun to be friends

19:14

with ghosts because uh you know you can

19:17

always account them to be wherever you

19:19

are at any given time I just don't think

19:21

that you can talk to guy I

19:22

I don't know I don't know with your

19:24

personalities held intact on the ghost

19:27

yeah this is a well known medium we'll

19:30

get into this we have the Fox sisters

19:31

and of course the most famous one I

19:33

think of our lifetime right now is John

19:35

Edward VII let the scandalous former

19:38

vice presidential candidate but the guy

19:40

who can communicate with the dead yeah

19:41

there it's actually the same guy it's

19:43

the same guy on that would be quite the

19:46

life story yeah I would like to read

19:47

that

19:48

well this alright so I also feel there's

19:50

a sort of did there there is a

19:52

connection to wanting to who you want

19:54

people to believe in ghosts because it

19:56

allows them kind of give them hope for

19:57

an afterlife and like you you kind of

20:00

want to set this up especially when you

20:01

read does it though because it also sort

20:03

of uh doesn't allow them to have closure

20:06

and I think it sort of allows them to

20:07

fantasize that all their dead relatives

20:09

are still alive as opposed to realize

20:10

and they they're dead and what is a

20:12

miracle want less than like closure

20:13

hearing I just feel like people don't

20:15

want closure people like to live in it

20:17

people like the what like imagine the

20:19

other goes I don't like health what do

20:21

you think Marcus do you think it's

20:22

healthy for somebody to be like I know

20:24

that I go to a psychic every day and

20:26

talk to my dead wife fuck no again it's

20:29

a good dreamily unhealthy and that's one

20:31

of the reasons why I love Harry Houdini

20:32

so much now was entire his campaign

20:34

against mediums and psychics and all

20:37

that time that comes from it like he was

20:39

also insanely up he was obsessed with

20:41

them yeah yeah well he was always

20:43

looking for his mama

20:44

yeah oh I see any never say they were

20:46

never able to find her yeah every time

20:48

like he because he saw that he kept

20:50

going these mediums and seeing that

20:51

these people were preying on people's

20:53

emotions and you know their their need

20:55

to believe that you know oh I can talk

20:57

my father I can tell yeah I can talk to

20:59

my father again and if I can talk to him

21:01

then someone can talk to me whenever I

21:02

die so therefore they never got there is

21:05

no real there is no real death there's

21:07

just like the next level and it is a

21:09

fantastic version of eternal life and I

21:11

would love to be it ghosts hope they can

21:13

get my weight down no that would be I

21:15

don't want you go you would still be

21:17

fuckin taking a lie I'll tell you what

21:19

I'm a ghost I'm gonna get on a scale and

21:20

be like I am five ounces I cannot

21:22

believe it

21:23

I'm trying to get down to three and a

21:25

half ounces every day you sound like one

21:28

of those like little girl beauty pageant

21:30

winners you never doubt your weight

21:32

toddlers in tiaras

21:33

I just watch

21:34

program not to get too off subject but

21:36

I'll tell you those gals are very

21:38

attractive they're like the thing is

21:42

they don't have boobs or butts but their

21:43

whole body is like a big tit but we were

21:48

talking about Cortado goes goes goes

21:50

goes goes the SafeZone ago pedophile

21:56

anyway so yeah this is where a

21:58

controversy with John Edwards can

22:01

actually start lists over the Foxes is

22:03

only because they became too because

22:04

they were a part of our when people

22:06

became obsessed with seances in like the

22:10

the late 1800s sure was like people it

22:13

was a very fashionable thing did like

22:14

like rich people would throw them like

22:16

you had a budget we like you know famous

22:18

people would do it like you know Lewis

22:20

Carroll and like uh HP Lovecraft they

22:23

were like the famous people like SERP

22:25

the sort of like seance culture and then

22:27

two of these very very popular ones

22:29

Margaret Fox and Kate Fox the Fox

22:32

sisters two became international

22:34

superstars because they could do they

22:37

said that they could only on Fox I

22:39

apologize as three Leah Fox Margaret Fox

22:42

and Kate Fox and their whole lives is

22:44

turned into complete total mess like

22:46

basically with you would create this

22:47

sort of like a physical phenomenon

22:48

around ghosts where they said they can

22:50

make these like popping noises it would

22:51

work you're like all around you like all

22:53

these like when people would pay a shit

22:55

ton of money right they became super

22:57

famous and then basically in a drunken

22:59

stupor like down the line one of the

23:02

sisters who become like this sort of

23:04

like a complete sort of flagrant

23:05

alcoholic once they stopped or who's

23:07

like we could do it with their feet in

23:10

our hands we figured out how to make the

23:12

popping noises and I said this like

23:14

whole thing and like ruin their whole

23:15

like legacy we're a fantastic yet

23:18

nineteen that was 1888 Margaret

23:20

apparently she confessed to the

23:22

wrappings and whatever they did so they

23:23

would just uh I mean I actually really

23:25

appreciate that yeah that the

23:27

showmanship but the art of yet alle

23:29

fantastic it's very Geller and what he

23:31

used to do and how afterward like and

23:33

then they found out that he was faked to

23:34

where it's like yeah I like seeing it

23:36

well there was some great tricks that

23:38

people would use like they would a lot

23:40

of women because you know the birth you

23:42

know the the infant death rate was still

23:43

pretty high super that point so women

23:46

would go to these media

23:47

and want to talk to their babies and

23:49

some of the mediums would you know they

23:52

would claim to be able to physically

23:54

make the babies appear like you know

23:58

parts of their head and stuff like that

23:59

guess what they used for it what's a

24:01

tits really yeah man they use they used

24:05

a tits cut-off tits no like somewhat

24:08

like a woman's tit like behind it might

24:11

occur like like behind the curtain like

24:14

you know I go to like feel it like a

24:15

venice fasten again well that sounds

24:18

just right oh we got to go back to that

24:20

psychic that medium was just right on

24:24

just it's like Lucy thing you should do

24:26

make a chick plasm yeah ectoplasm you

24:28

show up all the time or it's like they

24:30

would do all this crazy scene those

24:31

crazy pictures yeah yeah like all the

24:33

shit foot know they're like noses and

24:35

stuff and what is that a pleasant well

24:37

it is the that is just supposed to be a

24:39

physical incarnation of of the spirit

24:42

world like okay they would travel

24:43

through a medium and come out was was

24:45

clouds of liquid

24:46

it was just fake it was fake shit it

24:49

would just be shitters be like stuff

24:50

that they would miss like it was like a

24:52

goopy er gak yeah I did like Jack and

24:55

that day they did that too but because

24:57

that whole time period was so fucking

25:00

morbid like these to have all the death

25:02

pictures it was like I don't even love

25:04

those those things are so creepy what's

25:06

like after people would die they would

25:08

prop them up with using like metal

25:10

spikes and shit right into positions and

25:12

take pictures of them with the family

25:14

like it's like it's normal and the like

25:17

the glass cut the glass top coffins

25:19

those were huge in the late 1800s they

25:21

just all very bright to death

25:23

I mean health that was before reality

25:25

television we look at worse things now

25:27

rather look at a person in the coffin

25:30

than the Real Housewives of New Jersey

25:32

with you now and Matt so unfortunately I

25:35

really want to take a look at some

25:36

people in a coffin oh well yeah you can

25:38

just want to see some well I mean no we

25:41

signed you up for the millipede girl

25:44

well Jesus Henry I don't know where to

25:46

get you a dead girl so it's very very

25:48

very hard I'm get you dead girl alright

25:50

alright let's do this all over now

25:53

so eighty 1888 they ruin the reputation

25:56

Margaret and Cayden of just dying in

25:58

complete poverty and then of course

26:00

spiritualism continued on because you

26:03

know because you confess to recant it so

26:05

true believers and skeptics both got

26:07

their sides of the story and that leads

26:09

us to our modern-day John Edwards who I

26:11

cannot think of a current medium right

26:14

now was successful right

26:14

well there's him and there is a fuck is

26:17

his name's like Kenny Chesney was like

26:19

at any chest that country singing

26:21

Humphrey singers like you're gonna ride

26:25

in a car today it's gonna be a pickup

26:27

and your girlfriend just went in his

26:29

name fat I don't remember I don't

26:31

remember saying there's nothing I this

26:32

matter John Edward is just another type

26:35

that used to run the show crossing over

26:37

where which was a fantastic program if

26:39

you got a chance to see it where he

26:41

would get depressing it's so ridiculous

26:43

but he used to get you know the the

26:44

audience members use a fellow

26:45

questionnaires and yet people pump them

26:47

for information to the exact same thing

26:49

the televangelists do yeah where it's

26:51

just like they kind of like come with a

26:52

thing they want to talk to and then

26:54

right he'll pick them out randomly

26:55

because it's got like a fuckin ear piece

26:57

on talks or producer and then I well

27:00

yeah and it's just it's just a wheel of

27:03

fortune can I get an M I'm sensing an M

27:06

then raised and raised a hand that's

27:09

exactly I would do it um my mom died

27:12

that starts with an am like yeah yeah

27:14

yes I can tell and it's also very simple

27:16

to like if the woman's 85 odds are her

27:20

husband has passed yeah so go there cuz

27:22

you know they're gonna be a husband or

27:24

child a child because I'm not gonna be

27:25

her mother that's for damn sure

27:27

no yeah anyone over and I would say 50

27:30

and under probably go parents yeah

27:33

parents have recently passed yeah 25

27:35

maybe an abortion type situation that's

27:39

pretty hot that would be pretty fucked

27:41

books if you can't talk to a fuckin

27:42

unborn baby yeah oh just go like he says

27:49

thank you for the memories

27:51

he's like you realize you're glad you

27:53

could translate baby squirm doc he's

27:58

with the whales now said oh he loved

28:01

whales I didn't know that cuz I never

28:03

fucking met him but I'm good

28:05

and I knew he would love well he died

28:07

three months in he was more fish than

28:09

humans so he's with whales

28:11

he went to whale heaven that's a

28:13

little-known fact however John Edwards

28:16

got into a little controversy in a 2001

28:19

shortly after those old September 11 BIR

28:24 11:11 3 you need to go outside look at 28:29

some bumper stickers that remind you I

28:31

love the fucking skyline every day Ben I

28:33

never forget Jesus you literally just

28:39

don't even know what you're not

28:40

forgetting I think there used to be

28:42

something up there but yeah he closed

28:43

that Dunkin Donuts ah alright number 11

28:46 2001 the Dunkin Donuts in the sky you 28:49

know what the Burger King still stands

28:50

yeah okay got blitz so he got into a bit

28:55

of a scandal after he was trying to for

28:58

the sci-fi channel reach out to

28:59

everybody who lost loved ones in 9/11

29:02

this was on October 25th 2001 and due to

29:05

public outrage and public outcry they

29:09

they canceled the whole show which they

29:11

should have well I mean I was a fucking

29:13

fake psychic yeah but as a society we

29:16

have given him a show and if if the

29:18

people that died on 9/11 aren't good

29:19

enough to be channeled through them who

29:21

the fuck is I mean okay so I understand

29:23

you died on 9/11 you get some sort of

29:25

you know special like okay your hero

29:28

type thing because God knows you went to

29:30

work on time this is why I always show

29:32

up late always show up late those people

29:34

who were like hi this 7:30 in the

29:35

morning want to be there by 8:00

29:36

after all those floors are gonna mop

29:38

themselves I mean I just it is a

29:40

terrible world's hardest the

29:42

hardest-working gene was their fault

29:44

well you know don't work so damn early

29:46

the terrorists have only won because

29:50

we're so damn motivated to get that

29:52

final sweet paycheck I'm gonna go sweep

29:53

the floors the best I've ever swept by

29:54

the time I'm gonna own this company

29:56

let's get the ghosts let's get well I'm

29:59

talking about one right now we obviously

30:01

passed on so uh so he started quite a

30:04

controversy with the 9/11 situation and

30:07

and I say overall though I think that

30:10

was kind of bullshit because they got to

30:13

let the man do the show and those people

30:14

that lost loved ones in 9/11 I think

30:17

that it probably would have helped

30:18

quite a bit uh uh Turley useless

30:22

activities I just I also feel it's a

30:25

goop I mean who knows I it's like dude I

30:28

just don't know if there's any record

30:29

psychics go back and talk to like people

30:32

who died in concentration camp is that a

30:35

weird sort of like ghost physics

30:36

question where it's like if a thousands

30:38

of people died at a time would you be

30:41

able to contact one individual ghost or

30:44

would they all be looped together and

30:46

some sort of giant cloud of energy well

30:49

that's the thing because I feel like

30:50

when I was watching this one a show as

30:53

well and they were going through the

30:55

Russian old prisons that they used to

30:57

use in the Soviet Union and the guy

30:59

walked into the room he's like man I

31:01

just felt like this and say wasn't a

31:02

ghost show yeah it was just a just a

31:04

history show he's like man II just feel

31:05

his presence of death and the guy who

31:08

was leading the guy that the dude who's

31:09

leading the guide tour I was like yeah

31:12

that's the wall where we would line up

31:14

prisoners and shoot him an

31:15

execution-style just countless thousands

31:18

of people and so he brought that up when

31:20

he walked me was just like I got a chill

31:22

you just tell death was there yeah

31:25

you're say unto that I think it's really

31:26

true I think there's all there's a lot

31:27

to sort of the idea of sort of like

31:29

collective unconsciousness and the fact

31:32

that like our brains are sort of

31:33

connected in a way that is like you know

31:38

like our internet ones like we're all

31:39

like you know we're like a bunch of

31:41

network hubs and our band our psyches

31:43

are connected is in electrical way in a

31:46

physical way you let you feel it and

31:48

that that when that shit happens when

31:50

you go to a place where like a when when

31:52

when some really fucking heavy happen

31:54

there over a mass scale and it's just

31:57

like your body knows it's wrong

31:59

like my body knows who I have to tell

32:01

what's been going on it's like when

32:02

you're in college you walk in to a

32:04

buddy's dorm room and you just sniff

32:07

around and you're like you've been

32:08

masturbated ha ha ha just masturbate as

32:11

I can tell

32:12

I could tell it's that sly smile on your

32:13

face and so where you're just lit leaned

32:16

on back on that bunk bed and just your

32:18

overall essence the essence of life on

32:20

check position coverings like hey buddy

32:22

how you do yeah

32:25

Oh buddy I'm so glad you came over man

32:27

I'm glad you came over

32:29

this time not five minutes ago because I

32:31

was joking a flappy that's right

32:34

ghosts coming all over town all right

32:37

well I think that's gonna wrap up this

32:38

episode oh hey I gotta do a Ouija board

32:41

sometimes you have to do a Ouija board

32:43

we're gonna do it now we don't have time

32:45

today well we'll do it next one there

32:47

there's so much more to talk about

32:48

there's haunted there's haunted

32:49

hospitals we didn't even get to like

32:51

coffee or anything like that you know

32:53

like there's yeah there's this I mean

32:55

yeah this is a two-parter right here

32:56

yeah it's a two-parter so we'll be back

32:58

next week and I'll tell you one thing

33:00

Henry I am looking forward to it

33:02

I like I like to do podcasts I am

33:06

looking forward to it so much all right

33:10

it's done stop listening now it's all

33:14

over when do the Ouija